Such late hours call for a slower song, a pensive mood, and lots of plain water (dehydrated from drinking too much).

I came across this awesome site to download music from, so I spent 3 hardcore hours just downloading music and nothing else. I ended up sleeping at 6 yesterday morning. But it was worth it. Now, I've got a whole repertoire of songs by bands I've never heard of and the music is quite my cup of tea. Though, my body clock's a bit screwed up right now.

So see, I love emo songs even when I'm generally quite happy which I am. They put me in this very collected-meditative kind state. And there's this brilliantly depressing song I got hooked on to the first time I listened to it. I think from the time I heard it till now (which's about 24 hours), I've heard it close to 30 times.

But emo songs, being emo songs, gets you nostalgic forlorn wistful. You name it. Most of all, it gets you wondering all over again. Not that the heartbreak matters anymore. Not like you're questioning all over again, why promises were broken. I mean you question, but you already know the answer. I think it's the disappointment people can't get over. Cos they pin so much hope on another they thought was worth it. I guess not.

I was chatting up with Zach over a dim sum supper and amidst business ideas, endeavours, and everything corporate, we talked about how relationships can be brought down to dust in just 1 night and a completely irrational move. He even admitted (yes, "admitted") to me with much honesty that all guys are bastards in one way or another, including himself. The only non-bastard guys I know of are the ones I watch on TV or friends of friends of friends which I only hear of. But who's to say, perhaps I haven't had the honour of meeting someone truly decent. Like, TRULY.

Forgive this terribly self-indulgent rant, this sweet dreary mood's gnawing on my nerves but I love it. Quite a closet screw up aye.

-

Katie, don't cry, I know
You're trying your hardest
And the hardest part is letting go
Of the nights we shared
Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting
But compared to your eyes, nothing shines quite as bright
And when we look to the sky, its not mine, but I want it so

Let's not pretend like you're alone tonight
(I know he's there)
You're probably hanging out and making eyes
(while across the room, he stares)
I bet he gets the nerve to walk the floor
And ask my girl to dance, and she'll say yes

Because these words were never easier for me to say
Or her to second guess
But I guess
That I can live without you but
Without you I'll be miserable at best

You're all that I hoped I'd find
In every single way
And everything I could give
Is everything you couldn't take
Cause nothing feels like home, you're a thousand miles away
And the hardest part of living
Is just taking breaths to stay

Because I know I'm good for something
I just haven't found it yet
But I need it

And this will be the first time in a week
That I'll talk to you
And I can't speak
It's been three whole days since I've had sleep
Because I dream of his lips on your cheek
And I got the point that I should leave you alone
But we both know that I'm not that strong
And I miss the lips that made me fly